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CHECK FOR THE CHECKERED EYE
(Published in issue 15 of the Canadian Blind Monitor, Fall 2003.)

By: Libby Thaw

In the fall of 2000, I attended a Canadian National Institute for the Blind (CNIB) service day in the small town where I live, Saugeen Shores, Ontario.

Resulting from macular degeneration due to Stargardt's disease, I have been legally blind since the age of 19, but have significant eyesight remaining; 20/400.

I've been a registered client of the CNIB since 1981, and therefore have always been notified of upcoming service days. So, on the advertised day, I rode my bike up to the Legion Hall to chat with other CNIB clients and staff, and see what goodies may be available to help me with fine detail visual tasks.

Two ladies at the hall were acquaintances of mine, and we soon found ourselves discussing circumstances relating to our visual difficulties. We ended up swapping stories of situations which were embarrassing or problematic, not because we couldn't see well, but because the people we were interacting with weren't aware of that fact.

A CNIB volunteer who participated in the conversation offered, "Clients have been asking for some sort of badge to let people know they can't see well". We all agreed that it was a great idea, but were informed that nothing like that existed...yet!

I went home, designed a symbol, and sent it off to the CNIB. I explained the discussion at the Saugeen Shores service day, and said they could use my design. My suggestions were turned down.

None of the concerns they articulated convinced me that it was not a good idea, so I decided to take on the project myself, and founded the Checkered Eye Project.

Even now, the concept remains controversial among people involved with the "blind community", and I'll fill you in on concerns that have been expressed.

"People don't want to label themselves."

Some people do. There is already a larger label in use-the I D cane. No one is forced to use either label. It's a matter of personal choice.

"The use of another symbol confuses the public."

Indeed the public is already confused. They haven't been adequately informed that some people use an I D cane, for the sole purpose of communicating the fact that they have some degree of vision loss. Therefore, when people such as myself use a white cane, we are sometimes suspected of using it fraudulently. So, since there is already a need to increase awareness, The Checkered Eye Project is working to educate the public about both symbols.

"Lapel pins are not a reliable method of conveying the needs of people with visual limitations."

Without some awareness, the pin on its own would not be very effective. However, even with just one person doing the educating, the Checkered Eye symbol is increasing in its effectiveness.

We must also remember that a Checkered Eye lapel pin, like a white cane, only gives a small amount of information. The individual must articulate his or her own needs, if they want them to be known.

"The white cane is one of the most effective tools for self identification".

Until now, it was the only one. Consider people who use wheel chairs and also have low vision; in this situation it is difficult to use an I D cane. There are also people with limited use of their hands and arms for whom it is impossible or difficult to hold the cane. And then there are folks like me who, when doing such things as traveling with luggage, transporting groceries, or attending small children, find the cane very awkward and cumbersome.

The white cane is an excellent beacon, to increase ones visibility in traffic, and a wonderful tool for mobility.  But if you don’t need either of those functions, it may be more convenient to wear a pin, rather than occupy a hand with your communication device.

So far, the education effort includes a website www.checkeredeye.com, public speaking engagements, and pamphlets on display in places like doctor’s offices, libraries and drug stores.  There are also stickers showing the checkered eye and stating “People wearing this emblem have impaired vision, which are displayed by businesses.

As a result of these methods, lots of letter writing and some media coverage, there are now people with low vision using the Checkered Eye in four provinces and three states.

I’m not sure how long it took to initially create awareness of the meaning of a white cane, but I’m hoping that with the effectiveness of the many mass communication systems of today, the checkered eye will be widely understood in no time!

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Everyone understands the term ‘blind’. Low vision is a much less understood concept, and the human relations aspect of coping with an amount of blindness which is not obvious, adds to the difficulties of the blindness itself.

I know from personal experience that some people to whom you mention your low vision will question you. It’s hard for them to comprehend the fact that you “seem fine” but you’re saying you can’t see well. “Don’t you wear glasses? Can you see me? Most people are polite and just want to understand. There are though, folks who seem to be skeptical, and may even test you; “Well you saw that!” Don’t knock yourself out with such encounters.

Some people may grasp your statement of low vision more readily if you are carrying a white I.D. cane, or wearing a checkered eye. However, the I.D. cane sometimes creates more misunderstanding than it alleviates since many of the general public think a white cane is only for severely blind people to use as a mobility tool. The checkered eye still has limited effects also since it’s not widely known yet, but pointing to it can help, as well as providing an information pamphlet, supplies of which are easily available and free.

You may also find that your family and friends forget that you can’t see as well as they can. My Mom for example used to point out things like the cute little lambs across a field we were driving past. While I could enjoy the thought of such a view, she’d forget I couldn’t see it. 

I’ve had low vision since I was a kid and have had lots of time to encounter these situations and develop my own ways to deal with them. Low vision which takes place in late adulthood creates a very different experience to that of someone who’s never had average sight. I know when I speak to adults who have lost some eyesight recently; I am reminded of the emotional pain that comes with losing some abilities and independence. I can only imagine the blow to the heart that comes with giving up a drivers license. What I have learned in recent years, that helps me with this kind of upset, is to go ahead and feel it. I’m not recommending that anyone wallows on and on in their sorrows, but to go ahead and experience all emotions. Of course there are moments that are more appropriate than others, for having one’s feelings. Not for example, while a little old lady helps with crossing the street, but perhaps later, alone or with a trusted friend.

It’s been my experience that these emotions are easier to manage when they come up unexpectedly, if I haven’t been choking them down in every other instance.

People who have newly acquired low vision are often reluctant to acknowledge their difficulties or seek advice or assistance. Many such folks probably come up with some simple solutions like magnifiers, ‘following the sheep’ at traffic lights, saying hi to everyone in case it’s someone they know. I suspect however, that they will find that they’ve been doing some things the hard way, and that there is a wealth of helpful hints and support if they are interested in accessing it through organizations of people with blindness and service providers for us.

I’m sure there are folks like me who can attest to some of the advantages of having low vision. Things like the ignorant bliss I lived in before a close friend told me that there’s hair on my toes which also needs to be shaved! Or how, as long as I don’t lean in close to the mirror, I always look flawless. 

Of course this is a tongue in cheek perspective, but let’s face it; humor can be a wonderful coping tool. There are things I can laugh at in the moment, like getting a handful of sticky goo when I tried to open an already opened jam jar. Things I may laugh at later like when I asked an old boyfriend who said hello, “how do I know you?” And my kids and I still  laugh at photos of the giant, brightly colored hats I made them wear when I took them to the beach, and how I used to make them sing at the top of their lungs so I knew they were still there if they were playing a distance away from me.

Humor is something that you don’t have to be blind to know is one useful mechanism for coping with difficulties.

It can also be helpful to decide not to resist or deny the new or different ways you do things if you have any measure of blindness. And realize that you have no power over how someone else will respond to the way you do things. We can only do what we can do, and trust ourselves to handle the results.

In the words of someone close to me: “Be gentle with yourself. Be gentle with the world.”

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